I’ve been thinking about this article a lot, since I read it a couple of weeks ago.
Letting people know that I am bipolar is terrifying, every single time I must do it. It doesn’t matter the context of the relationship – romantic, sexual, completely platonic… sometimes even just work. And it’s not something I feel I can really keep from people – sometimes it’s not easy for me to hide the fact that my brain just functions differently. But I am scared that it’s a deal breaker. That the person I’ve met and I’m excited by the prospect of getting to know will decide that the idea is too much. Or just how they view me or interact with me will change. It’s not even like I can blame them. That, with the generally hyper-active anxiety, OCD and PTSD. I know I can be a lot to deal with. But feeling that change in interaction is always sucky.
I’m lucky, in that I have one of the most solid supportive group of people behind me who can usually tell when “bad brain” is the predominant brain working. I’m lucky in a lot of ways. And doing a bunch of reflection and figuring out why things in the past didn’t work, and how to get to the places I want to be in life. Maybe that’s why this article has made me quite as contemplative as it has.
https://www.latimes.com/lifestyle/story/2021-09-25/la-affairs-im-bipolar-was-it-a-deal-breaker?
Going for a real theme there with those titles apparently. Ah well.
Shpunkey 