Out

Well. I am awful at just sitting down and writing. This is evident in the years of sporadic entries here. I want to be more consistent with my writing. It’s something that, despite appearances, is important to me. I am going to try to do better. I have the time now.

I was discharged from Discovery at the end of April and have since returned to work. I haven’t started streaming again. I don’t feel fully recovered. I am doing my best, but I’m drained getting through each day. I’m more hesitant in different areas of my life. My anxiety is easily provoked. My ability to focus is all over the place. I’m kind of a mess right now. But I recognize the messiness and I’m trying to do things to rectify it. I learned a lot of tools for regulating, standing up for myself, and self-care while I was in treatment. I’ve been putting them to use.

I’m working on getting my life in order. I’m going to get to a point where I have the energy and wherewithal to start streaming again. I just need to find a balance being me. And being out of treatment. And living my life.